Maybe I slept early semalam.. Now after Subuh prayers, I'm wide awake. Heheh.
And tetiba teringat my awesome 'little sister' back home. Well, she's not exactly my little sister lah.. (not biologically anyway), but we used to hang out and talk about life. And she always cari I when she needs some "adult" advice.. hehe..
Well anyway, she sent me an SOS message yesterday telling me that her fiance had bailed out on her again. Call it wedding jitters or whatever, apparently he's having cold feet and had called off the wedding which was scheduled to be held next month.
Sigh. Kesian dia.. especially since this is the third time he's called off the wedding. THIRD time. I didn't tell her to leave him. Neither did I tell her to pujuk him to stay. I told her to think hard.. sebab if he could give up on her three times (and they fought over stupid things pulak tu), what guarantee that she has that he will not divorce her at the first sign of trouble?
Well anyway, this "open letter" is for her.. Hope this will help her decide if he's really worth fighting for..
Girl..
Marry someone who treats you right
Someone who respects you and will be patient with you
Girls are hormonal creatures.. we have our mood swings.. we're more emotional
So we need a man who will not leave us even when we turn into a grumpy bitch
Marry someone who is kind
Someone who understands that women should be protected
Demanding for equality doesn't mean that we don't need their help
Equality just means that we are allowed to share ideas
Allowed to contribute to the family too
And allowed to have a say in raising the kids
Marry someone who spoils you rotten
Who helps put food on your plate, open the door when your hands are full
And who would help you carry the groceries to the kitchen
After all, wouldn't you want him to be the example of a lovely gentleman to your sons?
Wouldn't you want your daughters grow up seeing all the love and wishing that they will find a husband just like their dad?
Marry someone who doesn't give up on you easily
Sebab like I said lah, we are emotional people
We can't be kind and loving all the time
We throw tantrums too.. especially when we are sick or tired
And we would appreciate all the support during those tough days
We definitely don't want someone who kept threatening "to leave us" every time we fight, kan?
I know we sometimes ask too much.. but really, God made us (women) to be weaker than the men
That's why even when we die, we decay faster than men, you know
But while we can be an emotional wreck, we are also more loyal and faithful
When we love, we love unconditionally
When we spoil our men, we spoil them rotten.. kan?
So please think carefully ya..
A good man will be by your side through sickness and health..
Through the laughter and the tears
He will guide you when you go astray and try to make you a better Muslim
After all, dia akan tanggung your dosa selepas kahwin, kan?
A man worth keeping is someone whom you will be proud to be with
He doesn't have to have a string of degrees or a truckload full of money
But he should be someone who is responsible.. someone who will make his family his priority
Someone who is willing to share his happiness and worries with you
Someone who wants you to be a part of his life
Please don't marry someone who doesn't want to marry you
Or someone who says he wants to marry you but was never serious about it
Asking a girl for marriage is not something to play with
Tak baik kan, mainkan hati dan perasaan perempuan, kalau takde niat nak kahwin ngan perempuan tu
Lebih baik diam and tak propose, sampai dah bersedia untuk jadi seorang suami
Don't enter into a marriage and expect a man to change
You don't expect to change also kan, when you said "yes" to his proposal
Marriage isn't about finding a perfect partner
It's about starting a life with someone who is full of flaws (the snores, the farts and other disgusting stuff)
More importantly, it is about starting a life with someone who wants to be with you till death do you part
It's about compromise.. and give and take..
Sigh. I'm sorry for rambling.
What do I know of marriage kan?
I'm just an old spinster who can't even make a man fall in love with her enough to want to marry her
But I have been with enough men.. to know what I want, and what I don't want in a man
I have enough friends around me with marital problems to understand that marriage will always be a work-in-progress
Husband and wife must love and respect each other enough to want to make things work
Marriage is a two-way street; it must be reciprocal
You take care okay..
Do your istikarah and never give up
Jodoh ini di tangan Tuhan
Have faith, that when dua hati dah terbuka untuk bersama, it means that itulah jodoh kita
Baik buruk, we have to make it work
Kan?
Love you girl.. And I wish you all the best.
xoxo
And tetiba teringat my awesome 'little sister' back home. Well, she's not exactly my little sister lah.. (not biologically anyway), but we used to hang out and talk about life. And she always cari I when she needs some "adult" advice.. hehe..
Well anyway, she sent me an SOS message yesterday telling me that her fiance had bailed out on her again. Call it wedding jitters or whatever, apparently he's having cold feet and had called off the wedding which was scheduled to be held next month.
Sigh. Kesian dia.. especially since this is the third time he's called off the wedding. THIRD time. I didn't tell her to leave him. Neither did I tell her to pujuk him to stay. I told her to think hard.. sebab if he could give up on her three times (and they fought over stupid things pulak tu), what guarantee that she has that he will not divorce her at the first sign of trouble?
Well anyway, this "open letter" is for her.. Hope this will help her decide if he's really worth fighting for..
Girl..
Marry someone who treats you right
Someone who respects you and will be patient with you
Girls are hormonal creatures.. we have our mood swings.. we're more emotional
So we need a man who will not leave us even when we turn into a grumpy bitch
Marry someone who is kind
Someone who understands that women should be protected
Demanding for equality doesn't mean that we don't need their help
Equality just means that we are allowed to share ideas
Allowed to contribute to the family too
And allowed to have a say in raising the kids
Marry someone who spoils you rotten
Who helps put food on your plate, open the door when your hands are full
And who would help you carry the groceries to the kitchen
After all, wouldn't you want him to be the example of a lovely gentleman to your sons?
Wouldn't you want your daughters grow up seeing all the love and wishing that they will find a husband just like their dad?
Marry someone who doesn't give up on you easily
Sebab like I said lah, we are emotional people
We can't be kind and loving all the time
We throw tantrums too.. especially when we are sick or tired
And we would appreciate all the support during those tough days
We definitely don't want someone who kept threatening "to leave us" every time we fight, kan?
I know we sometimes ask too much.. but really, God made us (women) to be weaker than the men
That's why even when we die, we decay faster than men, you know
But while we can be an emotional wreck, we are also more loyal and faithful
When we love, we love unconditionally
When we spoil our men, we spoil them rotten.. kan?
So please think carefully ya..
A good man will be by your side through sickness and health..
Through the laughter and the tears
He will guide you when you go astray and try to make you a better Muslim
After all, dia akan tanggung your dosa selepas kahwin, kan?
A man worth keeping is someone whom you will be proud to be with
He doesn't have to have a string of degrees or a truckload full of money
But he should be someone who is responsible.. someone who will make his family his priority
Someone who is willing to share his happiness and worries with you
Someone who wants you to be a part of his life
Please don't marry someone who doesn't want to marry you
Or someone who says he wants to marry you but was never serious about it
Asking a girl for marriage is not something to play with
Tak baik kan, mainkan hati dan perasaan perempuan, kalau takde niat nak kahwin ngan perempuan tu
Lebih baik diam and tak propose, sampai dah bersedia untuk jadi seorang suami
Don't enter into a marriage and expect a man to change
You don't expect to change also kan, when you said "yes" to his proposal
Marriage isn't about finding a perfect partner
It's about starting a life with someone who is full of flaws (the snores, the farts and other disgusting stuff)
More importantly, it is about starting a life with someone who wants to be with you till death do you part
It's about compromise.. and give and take..
Sigh. I'm sorry for rambling.
What do I know of marriage kan?
I'm just an old spinster who can't even make a man fall in love with her enough to want to marry her
But I have been with enough men.. to know what I want, and what I don't want in a man
I have enough friends around me with marital problems to understand that marriage will always be a work-in-progress
Husband and wife must love and respect each other enough to want to make things work
Marriage is a two-way street; it must be reciprocal
You take care okay..
Do your istikarah and never give up
Jodoh ini di tangan Tuhan
Have faith, that when dua hati dah terbuka untuk bersama, it means that itulah jodoh kita
Baik buruk, we have to make it work
Kan?
Love you girl.. And I wish you all the best.
xoxo
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